i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
Randomize
