I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Randomize
