Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
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