I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
