David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
