I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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