Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
