You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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