Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
