Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
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