its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Randomize
