well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
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