i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize
