I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
Randomize
