You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Im too awkward for one night stands. I need to hire someone to come clear them out of my bed before I wake up.
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
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