They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
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