Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
Randomize
