A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
they're like a gay fantastic four
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Omg I joined a choir last night...
Congratulations! We have a period
Randomize
