The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
Randomize
