When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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