return my video game
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
Randomize
