Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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