69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
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