You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
These tits shall not be calmed
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
