You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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