Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
Randomize
