Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
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