You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
What the fuck I just showed up to court still drunk and the judge told me I smelled like his wife
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
i dont even know how to be here
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
Randomize