woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Randomize
