I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
So I have $4.22 in my bank account, just wrote a check for a tooth brush from quikmart, and bought a 25 cent condom from the bathroom. i don't know whats more sad, my bank account or the fact that i'm entrusting my entire future to a condom machine that was probably last filled in 1970
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Randomize
