how can u be prego again
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Randomize
