What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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