Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
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