his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
Randomize
