Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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