the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
Be still, my beating vagina.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
