carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
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