i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize