Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
Randomize
