Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
