Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
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