so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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