I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
Randomize
