How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
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