Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize
