No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
