why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
I am full of burrito and curiosity
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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