So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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