You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Randomize
