I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
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