does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
